In Part 3, we're going to talk about gigging. Simple stuff really!
Step 6
Book some shows
Live music is the most important way of getting your name out there. Not everyone can be arsed listening to your music online, it's highly doubtful that even your mates will spend their hard earned cash buying a CD from you. Playing live gives you the chance to impress on audience even if they only popped in for a pint. A good place to start gigging is probably your hometown. Hopefully you'll have hyped up the gig via the internet (and maybe taken advantage of your free texts and bombarded your phone book getting them to come), word of mouth and maybe even a very small local newspaper column and you should have a healthy audience. Our first gig gave me false expectations as we played in front of a really big crowd I got a few delusions of grandeur and was always really let down after when playing to six people. I had a bit of a bad attitude here and really saw my arse in these situations, even though the 6 people might be really digging us. Don't be like me, a prick! Some of the better gigs we played in the end were to small crowds. It's worrying really, I've seen well established bands such as Sonic Boom 6, iSpyStrangers and more play to crowds of less than 20. You should be grateful that anyone has come out to see you!
It might be worth getting some kind of vibe for your band when you play live. I don't mean a gimmick as such but if everyone is on the same page creatively, it really helps. The same can be said with onstage energy, but use some common sense. If you're in a chilled out soul/dub group don't turn donning Slipknotesque masks and jump around like you've downed ten pills (Actually that might work! I've started a niche). Conversely, if you're in a highly energetic post-hardcore band like Leucine, don't just stand around looking bored onstage (the guilty party in question knows who I mean). Sometimes a good stage presence can be as important as a good sound and at the end of the day, how can you expect the audience to get into your music when you don't even look like your into it yourselves? Have no fear about looking like a bellend, people who don't know you probably think you are anyway.
For some reason, unless your a well established band, crowds in the UK just don't seem to vibe off you unless they're smashed off their tits. It doesn't inspire confidence either when the one guy enthusiastically getting down to your shit is ridiculed or started on because he's pushing someone and spilled their drink. Seriously, you're at a gig, get over yourself you twat! Sometimes people come gigs with absolutely no intention of listening to any music. They'll go for a fag or stand round the corner. It's your job as a band to suck these people in and change their opinions.
Always have a backup plan. Maybe a guitar string breaks, or a drum skin tears. Make sure you can bust out something that can keep the shows going. There's no stoppage time, the promoters not going to stop his watch while you fiddle about tuning up. Maybe you have an acoustic song you can start, or maybe you have some terrible jokes to keep the audience entertained. There's nothing worse than building the crowd up only to lose them before your dramatic ending because of some technical issues.
Dont' be late for gigs and always keep an eye on your shit. Bands are the biggest bunch of thieving little c*nts I know. Make sure you mark everything with your bands name on it. Bastions spraypainted their logo onto all of their hardcases and not only does it help with security, it looks bad ass.
Finally, don't expect too much support from your hometown. People are jealous, especially once they see you start enjoying some success. People in bands can also be this way, there's too much willywaving between bands and 'We're better than you' approach is tiresome so you just need to ignore it. Or start fighting. I remember Der Bomber more for their 'take no shit' attitude than for their music. Sometimes publicity like this works. Don't try it if your a bunch of weedy boys like Leucine, the finest fighting styles in our arsenal include Chinese burns and nipple cripples.
Step 7
Getting grown ups involved
You've nailed your first gig, got a few more over the next few months and things are going really well with your band. Maybe you're finding it hard to keep on top of your social networking, maybe you haven't got time to do all the business stuff with the band or maybe you're ready to go to the next level. So let's talk about Managers, Labels and Agents.
Managers
First things first, don't get your dad to be your manager. Surely, you out of all people can recognize how uncool your dad is. Then why would you trust him to arrange your gigs and speak on your behalf? Leucine never had a manager, while we toyed with the idea there wasn't really a manager could do that we couldn't do ourselves. A band manager is the person who takes on the BUSINESS of your band. If you know someone who's business savvy, is pretty good with money and has an idea of where you want to take the band then it might be worth thinking about. But if he's an ageing metalhead (like your dad) who gets you gigs in working men's social clubs where you play to old men, nursing a pint of bitter for an afternoon before going home and watching casualty, you might want to think again. Ultimately, you should let your manager source out the cheapest costs for merch, trying to get you in touch with media and handling any PR for your band. Personally, I'd still leave booking gigs to the band or alternatively...
Agents
Agents can be very useful and there are a lot out there. Often agents won't touch unsigned bands as there's not enough money to be made, but if you think you're ready for them it might be helpful, especially if you have a tour in mind. A lot of promoters use agents exclusively, especially for larger venues and sometimes you can only get to play these shows with agency help. Be warned, agents can be expensive and often demand a percentage of the takings of your gig as well.
Labels
Getting signed is the dream, right? Not really. We were approached numerous times with the opportunity to be signed but never by anyone good. Signing to a label is like a contract so never agree to anything if the label doesn't have the bands interests in mind and NEVER sign anything without letting some who knows about law have a look over it first. There have been countless examples of bands who have rushed into labels without reading the fine print and find themselves giving their songs away for free.
Step 9
Touring
I personally think touring is the best part about being in a band. When we did it we toured with This Years Winner Is and had fuck loads of fun. But I cannot stress enough, practice TO FUCK. Within 3 days of gigs my voice was almost clean out. We'd never done anything like it before and your body (especially my voice) suffers. For vocalists, steer clear of alcohol and dairy products as they constrict the vocal passage and try and get throat clearing stuff from the chemist. I used Vocazone, like Snoop Dogg uses!
But without TYWI on our tour, we would have been absolutely fucked . Loads of sites would suggest waiting a bit but if you have equipment that spills over onto two or more cars then you need a van. You end up paying so much in petrol that the price of a dirty old van becomes insignificant. The problem is that you need to be over 21 to get insurance on a van and it's very expensive. If you can afford it though, you're set. I would also suggest putting some decent money into as the last thing you want is your van to break down halfway to a show or the police pulling you over to find half your band scurrying between guitars like Romanian immigrants on the side of the M6.
While there's a lot of paperwork there are some charities who can financially support bands on tour. The includes allowances for food, petrol and accommodation. We never used it but there are some allowances out there for bands (especially young ones).
Keep it cheap. Chances are you know someone in the city your playing in or maybe they know someone. There are some genuinely kind souls who let sweaty boys in bands sleep on their floor, eat all their doritos and take terrible, awful shits in their toilets (thank you!). So definitely take advantage of these suckers as often as possible! I wouldn't suggest sleeping in the van either as it is always freezing and a bit cramped.
Tomorrow I will talk about how best to expose your band to the media! I hope you're still with me!
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